its been a long time since i felt alive actually. i started to feel depressed since past 2 weeks but i still can manage myself and control my feelings and faking around with my smile and laugh. kahkah sorry guys. i am so sorry for that.
dan the peak is this week. i cant control myself anymore, i cant be tough like i used to be, i cant and i cant. im so tired and i need a break from all these things.
perasaan penat untuk menjadi fake untuk sangatlah menyiksa....... bila mana kau kena panic attack, you cant even breathe normally and you feel your foots became cold gila macam orang yang memang nak kena tarik nyawa, rasa ada orang cekik yang kau tak rasa langsung oksigen masuk dalam rongga hidung even mulut. you cant see the world clearly as your focus towards the breathe was so damn much. macam ni ke perasaan orang yang menghadapi sakaratul maut? hm.
i am so nervous at all time, tengok cahaya matahari pun buatkan my heart beated so fast. kalau kira satu minit tu mungkin boleh cecah 200 denyutan kot aha over. you know what, i cant talk to anyone i feel so useless just sleep and baring terlantar tak bercakap dengan orang sampaikan peti suara kau pun dah tak function ahahaha. terllau banyak yang aku hadapi cuma aku rasa tak cukup untuk aku mention kesusahan aku sepanjang minggu ini.
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